If you are an avid reader of this blog, then you may remember back in June when I did my “25 things you may not know about me” post. Not only did I do one for Landon and me, but I had Josh to do one, as well. Referring back to that post, #15 stated that when Josh grows up, he wants to be a pharmacist. For the last 2 years we have been putting our life on hold, waiting for Josh to be accepted into Pharmacy school. This is a very competitive process, as each fall approx. 1000 people apply, and only the top 100 are accepted. You may think that we are very narrow minded, not applying to multiple schools, but we were really only interested in 1 particular school in Birmingham, so we were willing to wait a little while. So 2 years ago Josh was put on the waiting list. (Which means he was within the top 200, and if someone out of the top 100 declined a seat, he might (eventually) get an offer) We waited, and waited. Nothing. So, last fall, we started the process all over again. This time Josh was put on the alternate list, which means he was number 110 on the list, and if the 9 people in front of him declined the position, then he would get an offer. This time we were hopeful, we could see the light at the end of the tunnel. So, we waited, and waited. Nothing. Oh well, there is always next year, right? We figured our chances for getting in this time were slim to none because school started last Monday, August 16th. With this in mind, Josh & I had been talking all summer about expanding our family, looking for a new house, etc. We’re getting tired of waiting and putting our lives on hold. So, Monday night when we were taking our nightly stroll we got into deep discussion about our next step in this life, coming to a definite decision. It was so nice to be making plans about our future as a family. Then, out of nowhere on the morning of Tuesday, August 17th at 9:15 a.m. we got a phone call. Yes, it was THAT call. It was the school Josh had applied for. Someone didn’t show up to class, forfeiting their seat, and Josh was next in line. We were elated! Well, I was. Josh was pissed because they waited until the last second. So what does that mean? Josh would have had to move immediately, as less than 21 hours, to Birmingham, and start class promptly at 7 am the next morning. Actually, they really wanted him to drop everything and drive on down that afternoon, but that was virtually impossible. I just knew if we didn’t take this opportunity it would be gone forever, and since this has been our life, this waiting game, for the last 2 years I just knew we should take it. We discussed it, very quickly, and started looking for somewhere for Josh to live. He couldn’t live on campus because no one over the age of 24 can live on campus (dumb rule…) and for a 1 bedroom apartment we were looking at $700+. Of course since Josh would not be working, I would have to work full time. Schools had already started so there was no hope of me getting a teaching job – so retail it is. :( That means Landon would be in full-time daycare. Once we found out what the price of day care was for 1 month, $900, there was just no way financially that we could take on that burden, especially since we would also be paying for his tuition…which is an unspeakable amount! One semester costs as much as what I paid for 4 years of college at UNA. Eek!
Other issues to consider: My Mom. Who would take care of her? Our house: We would have to sell it pronto, because that would just be 1 more lingering payment that we would not be able to afford. Our future: Josh said it perfectly when he said that we had been waiting on pharmacy school for 2 years, planning our whole life around it. We have been ready. However, now our #1 priority was our family, and now that school was finally ready for us, we were not longer ready for it. Plus, making a move that quick with a family is difficult. Josh’s dad told him that if his heart was not in it, to not do it. We were seriously between a rock and a hard place. Josh’s main concern was that he would miss so much with Landon; his first day of school, when he looses his first tooth, etc. He’ll kill me for saying this, but it brought us both to tears. It’s funny how life works. You plan and you pray for things and you wonder why things don’t work out, but someone told me not to long ago that God always answers prayers. Not in the way that you want him to, and not always immediately, and we feel as if this is so true. Yes, we gave up a great opportunity that would have provided us a lot of wealth in the future, but at what price? We would have been dirt broke and miserable for 4 years, missing so much of Landon’s sweet childhood that we would never be able to recapture. Not to mention that we have always said, even before little ones were in the picture, that we did not want our babies to be too far apart in age. Well, Landon is 2 now, and so the clock is a ticking... Money isn’t everything, and doesn’t always create happiness. We would rather be considered middle class, happy and focused on our family than being miserable for 4 years, missing so many important moments.
When I told my good friend Beth that Josh got an offer for school, she said that maybe God was testing our faith, giving us this opportunity to see what was really important to us. Looking back now it is was an easy decision. Family first. God has a plan. Though many of our family members have said things like, "So what are you going to do now? What about your future? How are you going to afford Landon's college, etc?" Well, hello! News Flash - we're doing just fine right now, and only on 1 income. And it's not like I am going to be at home forever. I will get too antsy when our child(ren) start kindergarten to continue being full time stay at home Mom, so if I don't go back to teaching, I will at least do something to contribute financially to our family.
I have been doing a lot of praying over the last 2 years, and as my husband would tell you, I really believe in signs. A few days after we declined the pharmacy school offer I was rethinking everything, just to reassure myself that we did indeed make the correct decision. As I was sitting there, pondering, the phone rang. It was the assisted living facility where my Mom lives. The director said, "Lisa. Do you have a minute to talk? It's not an emergency, but we need to discuss something." Of course my heart was racing, but at least it wasn't an emergency, right? She continued, "We had someone from the state to come in and do an evaluation of the facility and of the patients. Everything passed with flying colors, but unfortunately not everyone passed. I am sorry to say that your Mom failed the survey/interview they gave her, which means that when they come back at the end of August and do a re-evaluation, if she doesn't pass then, she will no longer be able to stay here." Gulp. That was me, swallowing my heart that was lodged in my throat. Though I was fully aware that this day would eventually come, I didn't think it would be so soon. So now what am I supposed to do? If she isn't able to stay their, yet she's not ready to go to the nursing home (although I know it wont be long), then what? I have called all of the places around here that take Alzheimer's patients, and they all cost more than what she makes a month. What if we would have moved to Birmingham? There is NO WAY that I would be sane right now...I tend to stress out very easily. And then to throw this on top of me, please, someone admit me to the 400 unit. It is obvious that we were meant to stay here. As for my Mom, I am still waiting to hear from the facility once the review is done. I'm not 100% sure as to what to do, but I am just leaving it in God's hands. Josh & I have talked, and we have come up with a few temporary solutions. I guess we will just have to see how it all plays out. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger, right? Out of all of this, I do know of 1 thing that is for certain - I have the most wonderful, loving, understand, and caring husband out there. I don't think anyone in this world would put up with me, and my family, like he does ;) I love you, Joshua!
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